We make things so difficult sometimes. It's not even like we walked out of the frying pan into the fire. These days, we can walk off the beach into an ice storm of misdirected yammer. A colleague of mine reached out to me. He found himself under fire by his lady friend for no reason at all. Been there, lived that. One moment, you're all smiles, the next moment, you're being screamed on for no apparent reason. Well there was a reason, a very small one.
You're dealing with a walking, talking emotional time bomb. Except, that this time bomb is far too afraid to explode on the person that deserves it. So they find a comfortable target to annihilate. A major issue in all of this is when this misdirected explosion of emotions, suddenly causes an argument that never should've happened. These are the senseless arguments that somehow rips shreds into friendships and relationships. These are the senseless arguments that no one person ever won.
My advice was to diffuse all drama by simply saying, "When you're ready to talk about what's really happening, I'm here for you." If after making this statement you are still being yelled on for using the blue coaster instead of the green one, walk away. Allow for some time to go by. Also, by not fanning the flames, you are letting this person know that you won't be their voluntary punching bag whenever they're angry.
We must be considerate of others. When you are going through it, get through it. But not by yelling on the one person that supports you just because you know this person won't leave your side. Take a breather and lean on your comfort for a little support. Just don't drag your comfort zone down with all of your issues. Smile with them as well.